Overwhelmed

What do you do when you get overwhelmed at the sheer thought of the scheduled happenings in the next couple of days to the coming month?   Do you start planning and work the plan?  That sounds smart and reasonable.  Or are you like me, do you start eating sugar, mope around the house, sit on your butt and complain about things?  I get overwhelmed, then I shut down.  Ugh.   I'm shutting down.  I still have so much packing to do, the movers come tomorrow, am I packing?  nope.  blogging.  Makes perfect, logical sense.  Right?  Right.
I need my magic wand to wave and magically appear at our new house all unpacked and organized and ready for baby. But I think I packed the want already, and I can't find it.
Know what else overwhelms me.  The fact that the mortgage company is STILL emailing my husband for details on our financial status.  The question on Friday was, "how long has  your wife been a homemaker?".  Yesterday, we got an email saying to expect a call from the credit check company so we can provide a 12 month history of our current mortgage company.  What?! We are supposed to settle on Thursday!  Thursday!  And don't you think you would have checked that out when we originally applied for the mortgage over a month ago?  actually, More than six weeks ago?  It makes me nervous to say the least that they are still questioning us at this point. (We have been pre-approved, approved and given a mortgage commitment letter, but still, the questions--overwhelming).
Know what else overwhelms me.  The fact that our buyers realtor just yesterday emailed to see who performed the radon test and wants to know if it was done my a licensed contractor.  Yesterday.  We emailed that info to him over six weeks ago, and he's just asking questions now?  If they're not going to be happy with what they find, what do you think will happen between now and Thursday. I'm ready to buy a pound of Swedish fish and vegetate, or hibernate, or  crawl in a hole somewhere, and not come out of it. Ever.
The end.

Systematic Desensitization (in which I talk a lot about vomit).

As a former behavior analyst/therapist, I know what systematic desensitization is, and how it works.  Its a form of therapy to treat overt fears by gradually and systematically exposing you to your fear until you no longer fear it (or freak out about it).
Well, I think God has been using this method on me and my fear of stomach viruses.
Back Story:
When Q was just a baby, he got the rotovirus which was a terrible horrible experience.  Like 10 days of vomiting and diarrhea and he stopped eating maybe 3 days into it.  Awful.  And the main reason I will never refuse the new rotovirus vaccine.  But anyway, since then, anytime anyone mentions that they've had a stomach virus, or so-and-so has had a stomach virus, I go into panic mode.  Not leaving the house for unessential things, or not leaving the kids in child care at church.  Because church, as much as I love my church, is a breeding ground for germs.  I can predict illness by Tuesday if we've been to church on a Sunday.  Its predictable, just a given.  But I will sit up at night and obsess about hand sanitizer and panic about JD getting sick.  (cause I can deal with the big boys getting it).  I will count days between 'exposure' and try and predict when it the stomach bug will fall among us.  And seriously, will not sleep at night thinking I heard someone puke...its fun.
Or I should say, I used to do all  this, until recently.

Back in December, when we found out we were expecting #4, I remember thinking to myself, ohhhh man, what will it be like to have 6 people have a stomach bug in one house.  It would take a whole month for it to run its course!  Oy.  The drama that occurred in my imagination thinking about that.  Well, God's systematic desensitization began soon after that.  No lie, beginning a week after Christmas our whole family except me, got the world's worst stomach bug.  Scott and JD ended up in the E.R. for fluids thanks to dehydration.  And since then, I swear to you, someone in our house has gotten a stomach bug at least 2 times a month.  Which is ridiculous.  Back in January, I thought ok, good, at least we've gotten the dreaded pukes out of the way.  Because I recalled, we normally only get one or two stomach things a year.   HA!  No lie, twice a month, at least.  I should have written it down.  Its been an epic sick season, which still is going on in MAY!  (I had it last weekend).  But darn if the repeated exposure of me to vomit hasn't done wonders for my fear/obsession.  I no longer freak about it, dread it or obsess about it each time one of my children gets sick.   The repetition of illness in my house has made me numb to it, and not a freakazoid, thank God.  Really, it was bad.  And now I'm better at dealing with it, and lastly, my older kids are almost pros at being sick.  The last time Q was sick 2 weeks ago, I was in the hospital being monitored.  Scott woke up late and found the bathroom rearranged, (no floor mats), and the linen closet had been 'disturbed'.  When he came downstairs, he found Q in the the basement, with towels laid out on the couch and floor, with the bucket by him.  He had taken care of himself...(But you know if I were home, he'd have awaken me).  And thankfully, all these illness have stretched themselves out so not everyone is sick at the same time.  (well, expect for the first bout which sent 2 of them to the E.R.).

So, how's that for making lemonade out of lemons?  Yes, repeated exposure to illness has made me less fearful, and neurotic and all around just awesome.  ;)

Post Much

I haven't been posting much because blogger doesn't like my web browser anymore and wanted me to try google chrome to get blogger to work.  Well, I hate it when someone tries to pull a fast one on me like that, and resisted.  I was contemplating not blogging anymore, because who has time for meaningless drivel, to write it or read it.  Certainly not me.  But I find it cathartic sometimes, and lets just face it, the stuff that happens to me,--the world must know about! 

Well, I downloaded me the google chrome, and I must say, its slow and I don't like it, but I will use it to blog.  Maybe.  For now, at least.  Also, I have to complain about one more thing about blogger.  I hate commenting on other blogger blogs now, because they make you do TWO words now for verification, and I can barely read the words and it pisses me off.  But everything pisses me off these days.  

But lots has been happening in our house lately!

Lets see where to begin.

Well, we will not be homeless come June 14 when we sell our house.  God found us a home.  And a mighty fine home it is.  I say its God who found it, because it wasn't our realtor!  I like our realtor, somedays.  Most days.  But she was stressing me out big time.  We had a house that we looked at during the first round of house hunting that would somewhat work for us, but Scott did not love it.  I did, but the basement wasn't what he was looking for, and he couldn't finish it, so we never pursued it.  It sat in our minds as our back up plan.  I didn't want the back up plan because I wanted Scott to be happy about our new home.  Anyway, we looked for over a month, and placed bids on 3 homes which were not accepted for various reasons.  Main reasons were though, because the houses were new on the market and over priced and not prepared to deal with us.  One was freaked out by our settlement date that was 60days out.  So before we decided to settle for our back up plan, we decided to hit one last Sunday of open houses.  I was not optimistic because we had seen everything in our price range, but agreed anyway as a last ditch effort.  

We saw our new house simply because I knew where it was and knew it was an empty house (and that they would agree to a quick closing).  When I saw how much it was I didn't think there was a chance we would buy it.  But after a conversation with the listing agent that was there that day, I decided to flat out ask if she thought our best offer would have a chance at buying the house.  She told me "off the record" that she would encourage her client to seriously consider it.   I told Scott that after we left.  But the house didn't leave me with a lasting impression.  I knew it was big, and would meet our needs, but there's nothing fancy about it.  Just lots of space and a finisihable basement. No new kitchen.  Not even central air! (what??).  The next day, Scott told me he couldn't stop thinking about that house, and that we should put in an offer.  I was taken aback about that.  So we did put an offer in.  And like ever other offer we put in, I started to panic about it.  But later I prayed.  Prayed that I knew God had our needs and wants in his vision and that if this were the place he wanted us, that the sellers would accept our bid without a counter offer.  Our offer was considerably under their asking price.  But 2 days later, my realtor called and said "You got the house without any counter offer."  I think my words were "No sh*t.!?" (classy, and Christian like huh?).   

Again, I began to panic about money.  And prayed again that God would somehow put my mind at ease and give me peace that this was indeed a gift from Him.  And God does not fail.  Within minutes of praying that, Scott called me and told me he got a name of a different mortgage broker who would give us another 1/4% off the interest rate of our loan (which was a big difference), and God has shown himself in many more details in this home buying procedure.   I am thankful, and in awe of his generosity. 

So, if all goes well, we will be moving on up and into our new home on June 15.  That is if I don't go into labor (another fun story behind that statement), or go crazy in the process of packing, dealing with my dad (another story), or dealing with stomach viruses (viri?).  

Yes its been a while.  Maybe I'll get caught up.

They Call Him "Crusher."

I have written before that Q is a baseball fan. This year, Tee Ball has become a sort of nemesis for me. Its longer, and he has two games a week, plus practice some weeks, and its much more of a commitment than I like. But he loves it, and fortunately, Scott loves it too and takes him to most practices and games. Because Q's birthday is the cut off for most age brackets, he tends to be the youngest or oldest in his activities. He's the youngest in his first grade class, but he's the oldest on his tee ball team. So being the oldest, I think gives him an advantage on the tee ball field. Now, please understand, I am an extremely competitive person. Watching 5 and 6 year olds play tee ball is somewhat painful for me. Because Q is such a fan, and older, he is VERY focused on the game. When I watch the other players, pick their noses and day dream in the field,
I want to run out there and yell, "baseball ready!!!" and direct/coach them myself. For t
he love of all that is right and good, "PAY ATTENTION TO THE GAME!". I am going to be that crazed mom in the bleachers that gets kicked out of the game for arguing with the umpire. I can feel it coming. Or my favorite, when a player is standing on base and the ball gets hit and they sit there, argh, I digress... I haven't been to a game of Q's for a while, because taking all the kids to the game to watch Q play is, lets just say, difficult, I usually stay home with J. So Saturday, wanting to be supportive and wanting to sit on my butt for 2 hours, I asked Scott if he would watch B and J so that I could attend. I settled in my camp chair under a shady tree and watched Q play, and as always, it was entertaining. But one thing that made me smile was, his coach and teammates, call Q, "crusher'. They never refer to him by name, just 'Crusher'. Now, if you have seen Q lately, this nickname would make you laugh. Lets just say, the kid needs to eat more. He's tall and skinny. Falling in step after my dad and brother. But when he got up to bat, I found out why. The kid can hit! Tee ball is now coach pitch and if they don't hit off 5 pitches they move to the tee. Most kids can hit from the coach (who, by-the-way, needs some coaching in pitching), and Q is no exception. But dude, Q can hit! He does crush it! Like, into the outfield. And a weird thing happened to me. I started getting all prideful and started daydreaming about his future as a star baseball player. I promise I will not become that mom that thinks her kid is the best and wants special treatment. I'll try at least, not to be like that.

What THEY'VE Been Up To

So, its been a while since I posted anything about the boys.
An update is in order...
Q:
Now has a two tooth wide gap in the front of his teeth. He looks so cute! The tooth fairy "forgot" for the first tooth (some slack must be given to the tooth fairy, she was dealing with a vomiting kid or something of the sorts), but when she remembered, she paid well. He lost the other top tooth at school today. They gave him a little treasure chest to carry it home in. BUT, he lost the tooth on the walk to the nurses office from his class. He's bummed. He's back into Tee ball. This is a painful thing for me. They play 5 innings this year, and twice as many games, and they're all at dinner time. It dawned on me that I better plan to get each kid interested in a different sport so I'm not driving 4 boys to different games and practices in one season. Maybe one of them will be nerdy and like choir?? or band?

B:
Has decided he hates school, and protests much on the two school days. I think next year I will not send him to preschool. Its partially too because I don't want to drag J and a baby in for drop off time and pick up. Anywhoo...
He's four now. He enjoys everything Q does, is quite moody, but is very affectionate and sweet. He reminds me a lot of myself, in that he wears his emotions on his sleeve, and does not hold back much of his opinion. Which just means when he is happy about something he declares it loudly and proudly. I don't need to go into the negative that comes along with that. You get it. He is a chatter box and will talk your ear off. He is a good and adventurous eater still. He'll try about any type of food, unless it smells bad.

J:
Oh J baby. When will you talk? This kid does not really talk, but the weird thing is, he can mimic melodies and tones. Like, he can hum/dum de dum the tune of "Shave and a hair cut", and he can return a call when Q does it. Its hard to explain without a demonstration. He can also sort of repeat a scale to me, like if I sing "DO, Re, MI", he gets the "Do" with the d sound, but re, mi, fa, sol, la, ti all sound like 'ma'. He says "thank you" sort of the way you might if your mouth is full. And he calls us all by 'name' if your name is Mama! Like if he's playing with B, he'll say Mama in a way that sorta sounds like B's name. Weird I know. Q is a one syllable "ma". He's a lover of the outdoors, and I love that I have a fenced back yard. The second I step out front, he's running toward the street. What's up with that? He eats ok some days, not awesome on others. He will throw food on the floor immediately if he doesn't like it. That's my favorite about him. Not.
He can do hand-motions to songs, which is super cute. And he enjoys injuring his brothers. Which makes me laugh (because sometimes they have it coming), but at the same time, I'm worried that that little behavior will carry over to church nursery. Watch out!
Baby:
Well, I don't spend much time thinking about this baby at all. Sorry little dude. I still love you. I'm just so busy. I feel pretty good. I sleep pretty good for now. In fact, last night, I fell asleep and woke up at 6am in the same position ( I didn't have to flip over a thousand times!!). I was dead tired though.
We haven't discussed names at all. I haven't even thought about where I'm going to get a second crib and dresser yet. I have time. It cracks me up when I hear about all those first timers who have their nurseries all painted and set up by now (I'm almost 7 months). I'll be doing it when we move, if we get to move in time for babycakes!
He is an active baby. And has caused my nose to spread, my arms to get fat and a nice red rash to appear on my nose and chin. I think the rest of me is fat too, but I think that is my own doing. I'm a stress eater. I've been eating a lot, and a lot of easter junk.

So that's it. No new housing news. Oh except that the house appraised at value! God is good!!

I do not like house buying procedures.

I love buying cars. And haggling. When buying said car. I like the game. But dude, when it comes down to the house selling and purchasing process, I don't like it. I don't get it. And the words "closing costs" put me in a tizzy. I hate hate hate, the closing cost worksheet. It freaks me out. And I happen to like to have my head buried in the sand when it comes to knowing or not knowing what our taxes are, and what escrow is and all that happy horse pucky. Ya know, since we've been doing the Dave Ramsey thing, and I work with a cash budget, I'm very much at peace with our financial situation. But all this talk about mortgage payments and such, makes me panicked. I don't like it, and now I feel like, I'll be happy to stay in our little home, with the new kitchen and bath, and just suck it up. I don't like this process. I also don't like making big decisions. Like if we get this house, we'll be house poor for a while, but its everything we'll need. But if we get this other house, we won't be house poor, BUT we'll need to replace every major appliance in the next couple of years, and have to put a lot of other work into it.
I don't like decisions. Nor DIY home improvement projects. Nor Negotiations. Nor Realtors. Or crazy home owners/sellers.

In efforts not to seem negative:
I DO LIKE:
-3 day old stale Peeps. (fresh ones are too soft and smushy)
-Jelly Beans
-My family
-When J likes to eat what I made for dinner and can't get enough of it. There's such satisfaction in it for me.
-Toothless 6 year olds who keep me informed on how great and all knowing God is. Just two seconds ago, Q reminded me that God knows how many raindrops there are and how many hairs we have on our head. It was just enough of a reminder to know that God KNOWS our situation and what is best for us. I have to take peace in that. That through this process of finding a home, God has already got it under control.

How Good is God?

I had several people praying for a fast sale of our home. Well, we officially went 'on the market' on Thursday, by Sunday we had an offer on the table, and last night we signed our agreement of sale! How's that for fast?We still have some hairy details to wait on and settlement isn't until June, but praise God!
We are specifically praying now that our home will appraise for the sale amount. (which it is entirely possible it won't and then I think we will pull out of the sale). I go back and forth about being in a panic about it. During the day, I tell myself that God has it under control and that I have faith that it will go smoothly. But being the ever positive person that I am, never thinking of all that could go wrong, HA!--My dreams tell me how much anxiety I have over the sale I have. Last night, all of my fears played out in my dreams. I dreamt that the house didn't appraise, and Scott left me. LOL. Gotta love your subconscious.

But anyway, Thank you God for the first step being completed so quickly! Thank you for your continued blessings.